MsGeek.Org v2.0

The ongoing saga of a woman in the process of reinvention.
Visit me at my new blog, MsGeek.Org v3.0

Heard the Word of Blog?

Wednesday, September 07, 2005

Rage Against The Obscene: how Hurricane Dubya is making the rest of my life suck too.

Someone very wise once said this: Rage is the intersection of anger and powerlessness. Or was it anger and hopelessness? In any event, basically I feel like my skin has been rubbed raw by sandpaper. The slightest irritant feels much worse than it actually is. Doing my math homework feels like I've been tasked with the same task King Sisyphus got in the afterlife. Brushes with bureaucracy at school feel like a skirmish in a war. I got so keyed up today that sitting through a class today I couldn't concentrate worth a tinker's damn. Minor annoyances blow up into big horrible things. Of course, rationality always wins and I stop myself from doing stupid things like killing people who annoy me.

It's hard to keep one's "eyes on the prize" when one feels that there's people who need not only your help but the help of people with more resources than you and you can do fuck-all to help them. If I was to simply pick up and leave for one of the places where the Hurricane refugees have been relocated, I would lose the momentum I have picked up with school and be exactly 2 years away from my Bachelor's Degree. I would likely owe Woodbury University beaucoups argent without getting any benefit from it.

Anyway, I think what I should do is to get some counseling, stat. I have an appointment on Friday but maybe I should drop in at the Woodbury clinic tomorrow. I can at least take some cold comfort in the fact that I'm not the only person feeling like this.